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Fucktard Of The Week!

From the original Analog Industries archive. Some links and images from that era no longer resolve.

This is a multi-part fucktard fiesta. Since this is on Ebaum’s World, chances are that lots of you have seen it already. But it’s new to me, and thus qualifies. I’ll grant that “eighties” implies a certain fucktard event horizon, and you have to _really_ be a fucking choad to get above the noise.

This guy not only manages that lofty feat, but he does it in style. It has that certain Top Gun quasi-gay porn quality, never mind the fact that his flow is fierce. And just because it’s Sunday and you obviously have nothing to do (if you went to Church, you probably wouldn’t be reading this web site, right) there’s a part two, which, believe it or not, is actually more Top Gun gay than the first.

Thanks (I think) to Magnus Olafsson for inflicting this on us.

9 comments

  1. inteliko

    I've been wanting to share this fucktard for a few weeks,but by no means does it take the cake of this weeks AI fucktard:

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=W3MsJso1coo&search=dave%20clarke

    It's the dj known as Dave Clarke ,who is sure not a fucktard in the dj world,just in this vid!

  2. boobs

    yeah.. this guy's all over youtube as well. pretty hilarious stuff.

  3. Tom

    This guy now thinks he's a big internet star like the 'I kiss you' guy, and he's trying to cash in.

    This is his home page. Be sure to visit the gallery.
    http://www.dennyblaze.com/index.html

    You can buy his autograph for $3 here:
    http://www.blazinhazen.com/

    Here's his new single. It's more fucked up than you can possibly imagine:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H6xT9-jD7z4

    That Dave Clarke video is incredible. I didn't know he had it in him.

  4. RexRhino

    <i>"As you can see, I ain't black... I don't do drugs... and I am not on crack."</i>

    So, let me get this straight?... In Average Homeboy's universe, being black is comparable with doing drugs or being on crack? Is it just me, or does this just seem a tad racist?

  5. Chris Randall

    As my dear ol' momma always said, "fucktard is as fucktard does..."

    --CR

  6. penzoil washington

    that's some Hard Core Fucktard Porn!

  7. michaeluna

    The "Average Homeboy" video was featured in its' entirety in this year's Found Footage Festival ( http://www.cine-magic.com/foundfootagefest.html )

    I recommend you check it out if they're coming through your city. Words cannot do it justice. Suffice to say, the "Average Homeboy" is overshadowed to a great degree.

  8. ecallender

    Yo! William Hung must be sweatin' right now!

  9. JG

    Man, I feel dirty after watching that...the schadenfreude alone nearly gave me a seizure. Not to mention those phat Casio beats.

    So now I have to ask the question - which is more pathetic: if this dude really thinks he IS hot shit, or if he's playing this joke out for the money while turning himself into a national-underground-jackass-phenomenon?

    Actually, given that he looks like a gay David Hasselhoff (is that redundant?), maybe he should market his blazin rhymes in Germany. I would think that the hip teenagers over there would be able to relate to his questionable sexuality and total lack of syncopation, phrasing, taste, etc.

    And, dear god, PLEASE tell me that wasn't his ass in a bikini in the second video. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

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